Officially born Aisha Brown, but choosing to live as Jade. I always felt that I was unique. I grew up shy and didn’t know how to stand up for myself. Had no siblings and that is sometimes the one thing I still miss. I’ve been bullied, beat up, chased and talked about because of the color of my skin, and also the way my mother dressed me.
Growing up I was labeled “Retarded” because I couldn’t read or write as well as my peer group. We all know children that respond to difference in a cruel and harsh manner. My self-esteem was very low and I didn’t love and believe in me.
My trauma triggers are a result of flashbacks from unhealthy relationships that I had in my past. These trauma triggers have led to suicidal thoughts and several suicide attempts. I have been diagnosed with: Major Depression with Schizoaffective Disorder, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and Anxiety. I have had to learn to cope with Panic Attacks, an inability to control my anger impulsive and bipolar symptoms. I’ve taken up to 40 psychotropic medications to help manage my symptoms. .
Throughout my life span what has kept me going has been my kids, despite what they have gone thru. I will be forever blessed because of my relationship with for my mom be it good, bad or indifferent.
Today my truth is I’m 12 years clean, in a stable relationship, a member of NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) and I sit on the Board as the Vice President for the Atlanta/Auburn Affiliate. I’m grateful and appreciative for them and my involved. I am employed full time, a small business owner and conduct public speaking engagements. Giving back, feeding my spiritual consecutiveness and “Being my Best Self” continues to be focus; and so much more.
Is it easy? No. Is it worth it? Absolutely. Remember Self Care!